I am now back in New Orleans after a 2-day drive down from NYC. I left Friday morning, rather late, because I had stayed up the night before watching crap television, and my mom had all of these old books, CDs and other things from my high school and college days that needed sorting. I ended up just taking most of the stuff with me back home so that I could just go through it there. I was really excited about the CDs because there were about 20 that I had thought were lost forever.
I finally got on the road around 10:00AM, heading through Jersey into Pennsylvania along 78 and then down 81 through West Virginia and Maryland for about 5 minutes each and into the Shenandoah Valley which is a really beautiful drive, though in the middle there are some hills and turns that get a little nerve-wracking with all the 18-wheel trucks going 75. I finally got to Knoxville around 10 and spent the night at a Motel off the Interstate.
That night I watched the Strip Search marathon on VH-1, the first time I had ever seen the show. I thought it was really gay, and there were a lot of uncomfortable and awkward scenes, so I couldn't resist watching. Like when the Thunder from Down Under guys came and danced for the guys competing on the show, and then afterward they watched the guys dance for them, and then there was a lot of critique and discussion of smile and "personality." After that they all drank together and did what I assume were typical hetero activities like keg stands and passing out, and a lot of crying and missing of their kids. My favorite guys on the show were of course Adam, who was the biggest guy and the best dancer (though I'll get to discussing the dancing in a minute), and Ryan, this muscular blond guy. I also liked Bryce, and felt bad for him a bit since he didn't have the muscular physique required of a stripper and everyone pointed it out to him about every 5 minutes (these guys were real bitches).
Okay, so when these guys danced, it was probably the least erotic thing I have ever seen, just real cheeseball stuff. And I guess that has to do with the fact that they are dancing for a group of women who are looking at it very differently than, say, a group of guys looking at female dancers. I think it's a matter of "sexy" vs. sexual. I use quotations marks because it is a married, middle-aged woman's view of what is sexy.
But I digress. The next morning I woke up and got on the road around 11. Since I had to be back by 7 and I had the time change working to my advantage, I slept in a bit. The drive down from Knoxville, through Chattanooga, Gadsen, Birmingham, Tuscaloosa, Meridien, Hattiesburg and finally into Louisiana was completely uneventful. Because my car has neither a CD player nor even a cassette deck, I am forced to listen to whatever stations happen to be in the area. Thus, this entire part of the journey was dominated by country music and Christian radio, and mostly by the latter. I have lived in the South now for about 5 years, so I am used to hearing a lot of the outrageous things people say on Christian radio, and was thus able to avoid just driving off the road. All I really can say is that I hope the rapture does come in 2006 because supposedly all the good Christians will be taken up to God. Maybe then we can have some peace, without all their static. Either that, or all those Christians who thought they were going to be saved wake up to find themselves still here with the rest of us sinners and start to realize what assholes they've been their entire lives and thus get the fuck over it. Basically, either one of these scenarios works for me.
I arrived in New Orleans around 7PM, giving me about 15 minutes to shower and change clothes to head out for New Year's Eve....
*bonus points to anyone that gets this reference.
No comments:
Post a Comment